April 19: Big arse, no class, no elegance ...

We went off to the Show today, to see what was around

Saw lots of very special things, and different sights we found

But something we saw a lot of, something that was too much

What I’d like to tell you ladies, is you are so very out of touch

I don’t want to see your bra strap, as it spans across your back

Did you really think a backless top would look any good with that

It really looks just awful; and it stands out like a light

I’m telling it to you sister, it looks a bloody fright

I’m thinking that your denim jeans, might be one size too small

And the muffin top you’re showing off does nothing to enthrall

What is it that you want to say, by displaying all that blubber

I may not be too thin myself, but you look like a scrubber

So you thought you’d wear a G-string, it's your choice of course

But I don’t want to see it, it's not a look that I endorse

As it sits above your tracky dacks, on display for one and all

Do us all a favour darlin’, and your cottontails reinstall

And that tattoo on your shoulder blade, what’s the go with that

Did you really want a dragon, forever emblazoned on your back

That tramp stamp is quite awful too, why is it penned in Greek

And why is it written upside down, I bet you think it’s chic

And last of all my little lass, what is it with the rings

You ears, your nose, and in your lips, and many other things

It must have been quite painful, to put them in your face

But not quite as annoying in that other tender place

Big arse, no class, no elegance, no dignity, no style

Many of those that I saw would make you run a mile

Now I ain’t no oil painting, nor am I the perfect male

But some of you I saw today, your outfits are a major fail